i love both you and the german language way too much
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Donnerstag, Juni 15, 2006
Last night I had a dream that I was at...a hostel? with a bunch of ctyers and also Cheryl Bliss. Who thought I was Kathleen Hessman until I called her by her first name and I guess she realized she didn't know kathleen well enough for that to have happened, so she figured out it was me.
And I had to box some female celebrity, I knew who it was at the time but can no longer remember. Anyway, I hadn't really given it enough thought before I signed on, and I hadn't realized the extent of her training as a boxer, and I was getting increasingly nervous and asking people how to throw a punch. It was pretty intense. I never actually fought her, I was just standing up in front of people in this sort of yellowishly glowing (like mood lighting, kind of, I guess?) room with wooden panelling everywhere, waiting for her to come out and be announced.
2:25 PM
Dienstag, Juni 13, 2006
(back in westport, at least for now)
I went skinny dipping at compo tonight. that was...worthwhile.
I think I'm trying to become an adult, and that doesn't scare me. I think I'm ready to be an adult.
Not to the level of getting a steady job and staying in one place and taking on all kinds of responsibilities or something...but the kind of adult who is self-sufficient and can take care of herself and...I don't know, I think adolescence is characterized by a certain turbulence, and I think I'm ready to let that go. And to become less dependent on the various people in my life and more dependent on my own abilities. Also maybe to be more comfortable setting goals for myself, although obviously remaining open to changing them. I think I want to stay at Brown for five years and complete the simultaneous A.B/Sc.B., preferably in literary arts/my independent concentration in biological anthropology. I'm contemplating taking bio 20 or neuro or something next semester to see if I really mean this.
I laugh in the face of those who say only those who never want to try new things would feel an incentive to choose the new curriculum over something with requirements: HA!
I think that's (i mean adulthood) what I've been in search of with the whole mexico thing, and I want to call Geddes to see if that's the "same thing" we were in search of the day we tied our wrists together, because I think I might be close to finding it.
I don't envy people who live in New York city; they must never get to see their world asleep and deserted and thus wholly transformed.
Walking home tonight I saw 7 cars, 3 trucks, 2 police cars, and 3 dear. I terrified the dear. Poor them for having their flight response set off more readily by me on foot than by my car racing by. The dear really do have it rough.
3:47 AM
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